As a valued customer with whom you have been trading
for many years, we’d like to apprise you of our latest offers.
Your regular orders for explosives, together with your
continuing requirements for drophammers, piledrivers
and the largest of our anvil models suggest you may
be involved in the metal fabrication or mining industries.
We would be pleased to service your requirements
in these undertakings, Please let us know your needs.
Yours sincerely,
ACME Manufacturing
Dear ACME Manufacturing
Do you have anything for bird control?
Yours faithfully
W E Coyote
Dear Mr Coyote
We have a wide range of netting and gels which may be
deployed to discourage all forms of avian nuisance.
Yours
Dear ACME Manufacuring
I was thinking of something more damaging.
Yours
Dear Mr Coyote,
We have a number of programmable bird scarers
and also market a remote controlled drone.
Yours
Dear ACME Manufacturing
Can the drone be fitted with a chainsaw?
Yours
Dear Mr Coyote
The kind of equipment you describe would be
outside its lift limit. Perhaps an imitation hawk
would do what you require.
Yours
Dear ACME Manufacturing
Can the imitation hawk grip a stick of Dynamite?
Yours
Dear Mr Coyote
We think it could be adapted to do this. You should
be aware of the Health and Safety implications.
Yours
Dear ACME Manufacturing
I’ll take a dozen and another of your extra large anvils.
Yours