Posts
- A Feeling of Light-Headedness, by Simon Williams
- Just Sayin’, after William Carlos Williams, by Derek Adams
- The Thirty-Five Seconds University, by Phil Knight
- Why I Shall Never Invite You to a Passover Seder, by Bryan Franco
- Envy: So, Who made the Mouse King?, by Royal Rhodes
- How to Write a Job Reference for Someone who Thinks you have Forgiven Them, by Clive Oseman
- The Sad Life of the Shared Scone, by Terri Metcalfe
- Father knows best 2023 reunion show, by
- Mountain Man, by Phil Huffy
- Overhearing, by Carl Tomlinson
- Hoodie / English Major / Word Games, by Karol Nielsen
- Not too Big, not too Blue, by John Lanyon
- Rider, by Mark Cassidy
- Lemoga, by Heather Wastie
- My dreamed hedgehog. The new-Celtic elegy according to Mr. Pawel Markiewicz, by Pawel Markiewicz.
- Too Hot to Handle?, by Paul Francis
- The Poetry Reading, by Ben Macnair
- The Importance of Being Cormorant, by Beth McDonough
- Review of the Sky at Night, by Ruth Aylett
- Back Up Girl, by Elaine Reardon
- Feral Dogs of Riogordo, by Hilary Willmott
- The Responsive Awakening of Springtide, by Pawel Markiewicz
- Somber Sombrero, by Ben Macnair
- Safe Word, by Hilary Willmott
- Jewish Penicillin, by Jane Shaer
- Masseuse Musings, by Mohammad Zahid
- Play Story, by Clive Donovan
- This poem hopes to find you well, by Ben McNair
- I’ll take a look under the sonnet, by Arran Potts
- Feral Dogs of Riogordo, by Hilary Willmott
- Double Entendre, by Jeff Burd
- A cornucopia, by Finola Scott
- When the Palate Speaks, by Stephen Jordan
- Pissed as a Newt, by Sarah James
- Cucumber, by Susan Lindsay
- Lukewarm, by Terri Metcalfe
- Ode to the Best Medicine, by Phil Genoux
- Bloody Crows, by Agnes Warren
- To Blandly Go, by Neil Fulwood
- Dracula’s Cock, by Colin James
- A misuse of fruit, by Anne Babbs
- A Fleeting Glimpse, by Ben Macnair
- Life isn’t all unsolved murders by the sea, by Casey Jarrin
- Satan’s LinkedIn Status (Sponsored) by Stephen McNulty
- Meet me at the toilet rolls, by Margaret Jennings
- Some of the Ones, by Kate Ennals
- Boxes, by Rodney Wood
- Platform 7 – with Apologies to William Wordsworth, by Ben Macnair
- Who Needs?, by Neil Windsor
- Collage Machine, by Carla Scarano D’Antonio
- Frailty, Thy Name is Gertrude, by Jean Taylor
- Mystery Man, by Phil Huffy
- Frustrations in the Office, by Sarah James
- Holiday Memory, by Pat Jourdan
- Wolf, by Rob Walton
- Destination : Land of Nod, by Jill Vance
- Treadmill, by Karen Jones
- The new Celtic Ode to the dreamed mother Nature, by Pawel Markiewicz
- Metaphysical Hangover, by Terri Metcalfe
- Shelf Life, by Stephen McNulty
- Mr. Same, by Eoin Cassidy
- Carluccio’s, Ealing, Before Christmas, by John Lanyon
- The Archivist of Cathedral Hill, by Casey Jarrin
- Oranje, by Huw Gwynn-Jones
- Get Over it, by Tonnie Richmond
- Sort, by Sarah J. Bryson
- Coventry, by David Court
- Starless, by Patrick Chapman
- On waiting for a poetry journal’s acceptance/rejection email, by Terri Metcalfe
- Dearly Beloved, by John Lawrence
- The Yarn Spinner, by George Bastow
- Formication, by Tonnie Richmond
- Doctor Zeus, by Tom Barlow
- The mighty, by Ruth Aylett
- On Passion Spent, by Cait O’Neill McCullagh
- The Cost of Living, by Louise Longson
- A Dish Made by Myself, by Kate Ennals
- Goldfish Don’t Yawn, by Gram Davies
- Double-speak, by Margaret Kiernan
- On My Death Bed, by Kevin Higgins
- When Infirmity Struck Modernity, by Julian Isaacs
- A Girl from Yorkshire, by Neil Windsor
- Shakespeare has a Bad Day, by Clive Donovan
- Writing on a Roman Wall, by Ben Macnair
- The Day I Cooked my Son’s Speech Therapist, by Beth McDonough
- Celebrity Stoning on Thin Ice, by Terri Metcalfe
- I Said, Pointedly, by Phil Huffy
- The Passenger, by Lynn Valentine
- When I Die, by Tonnie Richmond
- Frustrations in the Office, by Sarah James
- Cabot Cove, by Jorge Leiva
- Flies, by Neil Windsor
- Lockdown Adventurers, by Heather Wastie
- Ageing Process, by Jane Shaer
- Internet Dating, by Fiona Sinclair
- Waiting, by Patricia Phillips-Batoma
- An Asinine Poem, by Bruce Morton
- Excuses, Excuses by Neil Fulwood
- When you type Liz Truss into a Random Title Generator – A Found Poem by Ben Macnair
- The Thief of Rhyme, by Sandra Bond
- The flower-like second sonnet, by Pawel Markiewicz
- Live Laugh Love, by Roise Curran
- Not an Epic, by Terri Metcalfe
- One’s Own, by Kevin Higgins
- The Lighthouse Keeper, by Ben Macnair
- Disco Badgers, by Neil Windsor
- The Cat Lives Rent Free, by Bill Richardson
- I Wish I Were a Vicar, by Trisha Broomfield
- There Used to be Nazis in Haworth, by Tonnie Richmond
- What we don’t know the cows know about us, by Bryan Franco
- Six Cornish Limericks, by Mark Totterdell
- Fostering an Elephant, by Matthew Sissons
- The Black Nightshade, by Patricia Phillips-Batoma
- Shopping, by Trevor Alexander
- Meanwhile, on a Sardinian Beach, by Maeve O’Sullivan
- How Spaffer Johnson got his name, by Colin Day
- Looming Days of Covid, by Tim Dwyer
- Biotechnology, by Patricia Walsh
- Cousin Ken, by Hilary Willmott
- Submit (to poetry magazines) by Brian Kelly
- George Actually, by Ros Woolner
- Cliche, by Terri Metcalfe
- Forever Changed, by Susan Coyle
- Camp Shangri-La by Arran Potts
- Moving Day by Leah Keane
- Oscar and Silicon Valley, by Anne Irwin
- Epic Puma Fresh for Alpha Men not Boys, by Mandy Beattie
- Mindfulness + Beauty, by Heather Nelson
- Instructions for a Scouse Night Out, by Jenny Robb
- The App, by Kevin Higgins
- Flat Earth, by Vanessa Gebbie
- Is my Memory Stick a Man?, by Lorraine McMahon
- The Little House on Poet’s Corner, by Tonnie Richmond
- Tory Schlock, by Sue Spiers
- Silent Order, by Joe Naughton
- Moral Limbo, by Ben Macnair
- Living the Alien, by Colin Dennis
- An Ode to Monty Don and the Pet Shop Boys, by Robert Garnham
- Sorry, by Emma Purshouse
- Packaged, by Beth McDonough
- Homing hairbrushes, by Sarah Dale
- I Thought I Would Be Invisible, by Karol Nielsen
- A Practical Woman, by bern butler
- On taking a poet to bed!, by Rona Fitzgerald
- The Bonxies, by Tonnie Richmond
- English Spelling, by Sarah Lawson
- Insects, by Gill McEvoy
- The Correspondence Promotion, by R. Gerry Fabian
- Summer Pastoral, by Maurice Devitt
- A Joke in French, by Mark Connors
- It Wasn’t Me, by Neil Fulwood
- Worms, by Sarah Dale
- The politics of envy, by Janet Sillett
- A Mossy Rock in the Forest, by Robert Garnham
- Davros’s Daughter, by Simon Williams
- The Cannibal who Came to Tea, by Arran Potts
- Help, by Yash Seyedbagheri
- The I.T. Guy, by Sarah James
- Inside my Head, by Susan Lindsay
- Why to run half marathon?, by Jorge Leiva Ardana
- So Surrey, by Trisha Broomfield
- It Always Starts with Jumpers for Penguins, by Jennifer A. McGowan
- Confessions of a Teenage Cigarette Smoker, by Sheila Jacob
- Infinite reveries, by Pawel Markiewicz
- They hire a Badminton Champ to Comment on Wimbledon, by Sarah Lawson
- Tania and Tim the Cat, by David Ludford
- Ballet Dancer, by Lesley Quayle
- An Archaeology Student Thinks about Sex in Maes Howe Chambered Tomb, by Tonnie Richmond
- The Queen’s Secret Siberian Sisters, by Bryan Franco
- Adjusting Attitude at High Altitude, by Clive Donovan
- Alternative Weather Fronts, by Sarah Dale
- Blob-Fish, by Ben Macnair
- Virtual Afterlife, by Alan Garrigan
- If I were interested in the history of the wireless, by Tonnie Richmond
- Paperboy, by Heather Moulson
- Jacqueline Wilson Lives Under my Bed, by Paula Gilfillan
- Russian Roulette, by Aoife Cunningham
- Lent in a Time of Coronavirus, by Sharon Larkin
- 15 Love, by Ben Macnair
- It’s Fine, by Phil Huffy
- The Bible as a Haiku, by Mark Ramsden
- Death Becomes Me, by Julian Matthews
- Sutra, by Eddie Gibbons
- Redefining Ireland, by Kevin Higgins
- Lecher, by S.F. Wright
- Beach Body Ready by Ben Macnair
- Should I Take my Bumbershoot With Me?, by Rodney Wood
- The Ballad of Laurel Blaney, by David Ludford
- They Will All Take Us With Them in the End, (After Tom Lehrer), by Neil Fulwood
- Me and Joanna Lumley, by Jennifer A. McGowan
- The Happiest Days, by Finola Scott
- Combat Cheese, by Sally McHugh
- Carrot, by Jenny Robb
- Monitoring my body, by Carla Scarano D’Antonio
- Wrinkles.UK, by Rachael Clyne
- Elon’s Folly, by Sue Spiers
- Circular, by Sharon Phillips
- Yes, the post-op went swimmingly, by Beth McDonough
- The Naked Lecturer of Chorlton Cum Hardy, by Michelle Diaz
- My Son Teaches me How to Dress, by Jinny Fisher
- Appearances of the Loch Ness Monster, by Neil Fulwood
- Superwoman and the mote, by Rose Lennard
- Winter Wasp, by Nikki Robson
- I Wish I Lived in a Bungalow, by Robert Garnham
- Facebook Update, by Kevin Higgins
- Prayer Before Sleep, by Nikki Fine
- Birthday Cake Flavoured Protein Bar, by Stephen McNulty
- Super Spreader, by Vanessa O’Reilly
- Brace Yourself, by Vinny Glynn-Steed
- I Wore a Red Hat, by Trisha Broomfield
- Tripping with TJ, by Steve Bailey
- On First Looking into the Oriental Chill Cabinet at Waitrose, by John Lanyon
- Bored, by Margaret Jennings
- The Storage Unit, by Jeremy Szuder
- Recycling is good for the planet, by Finola Scott
- Abominable Manners, by Catherine Doherty Nicholls
- Bohemian Raspberry (Liqueur), by Vanessa O’Rielly
- Corpus Christi College has no pastry chef, by Natalie Shaw
- Is Poetry Pointless?, by Alanna Hammel
- My last joke, by Jorge Leiva Ardana
- Sprouts, by Claire Hardisty
- What do you think of, by Sarah J Bryson
- The Urban Cowboy, by Ben Macnair
- Apartment 5E, by Kevin Higgins
- Stopping by stairs on a frosty morning, by Fianna
- A Last Will for your Detriment, by Cáit O’Neill McCullagh
- The Birds and Bees at Aldi’s Checkout, by Lorraine Carey
- There Was Once A Girl with Red Glasses, by Pip McDonald
- Five More Limericks, by Mark Totterdell
- AlApHaBeTi-KiNtSuGi, by Mandy Beattie
- Life Isn’t All Baubles, by Janet Sillett
- Dressing up in Lockdown, by Shanta Acharya
- Human Nature, by Eric Burgoyne
- Schoolyard Memory, by Maurice Devitt
- I Have Something to Say About Crochet, by Carla Scarano D’Antonio
- The Poem that Got Me Cancelled, by Daragh Byrne
- Go on, make mine that boil-in-the-bag by the stove, by Beth McDonough
- Mr. Electable and Family, by Mark Jones
- Something Fishy . . . By Carole Donaldson
- Too Many Straights, by Claire Duthie
- Bruce Wayne : Space Pioneer, by Ross Crawford
- Frames, by Eddie Gibbons
- Oh Me!, by beam
- Cop O The North, by Cáit O’Neill McCullagh
- Tu-tu in Training, by Trisha Broomfield
- From the Rag, by Christian Scully
- When I Come to Power, by Kevin Higgins
- Iona walk of shame, by Jay Whittaker
- Half an hour’s work, by Sarah J. Bryson
- Surf School, by Robert Garnham
- There’s a Fucking Fly in my Fridge, by Paula Nicholson
- Just Desserts, by Greg Freeman
- Errands, by Sarah J. Bryson
- Grumpy Bumpy Poem, by Ed Poetastic
- Strictly Speaking, by MT Taylor
- The Ongoing Saga of Why I Haven’t Finished my Novel, by Nikki Fine
- Zenith, by Kevin Higgins
- Fags villanelle, by Heather Moulson
- Weeping Willow, by Jane Shaer
- The love song of Sergeant Wilson, by Ben Macnair
- Rubbish Love Poem, by Martin Grey
- What is a marriage?, by Bridget Hynes Murphy
- Bed of Nails – Nail Beds, by Mandy Beattie
- She was no James Herriott . . . By Aine Kelly
- Iron Hat, by Ed Poetastic
- Attitude to Life, by Nancy Tully
- The Ballad of Bertie Bassett and the Bisto Kids, by Ray Pool
- An Ode to Simon Reeve, by Robert Garnham
- Playing Space Invaders, by Ann Gibson
- Body Art, by Jennifer A. McGowan
- Loyalty Penalty, by John Lanyon
- Ageing Process, by Jane Shaer
- Jack Kerouac’s Orange (An Origin Myth) by Cáit O’Neill McCullagh
- Knock Knock, by Ed Poetastic
- Whatever Happened to Fay Wray?, by Dominic Weston
- Homing Pigeon, by Hilary Willmott
- A man on the 19.34 to Birmingham New Street, having misread the signals, uses his mobile to try to arrange another date with the woman who has hastily waved him off at Liverpool Lime Street , by Emma Purshouse
- To Professor John Henderson, by Maria Andrews
- Do Come to my Party, by Ruth Aylett
- Earthworms are Awesome, by Holly Conant
- Plums, by Lee Campbell
- My Mother Said, by Sharon Phillips
- Reincarnation Revenge, by Catherine Doherty Nicholls
- One to Tenant, by Peter O’Toole
- Vege, by Julian Matthews
- How Papa Never Got His Guapa, by Julian Isaacs
- Two-day soap sud death dance, by Gary W. Hartley
- Golfing Heaven, by Paul Francis
- Sleep on me, by Enda McGarth
- Their Relationship Inventory, by Kevin Higgins
- President Marcus Choy, by Art Ó Súilleabháin
- No Joy, (after Marie Kondo), by Agnes Warren
- King Roger, by Melanie Branton
- Colonoscopy, by Vern Fenn
- The Neighbour’s Fish, by Lynn White
- Bubble Wrap Blues, by Pete Mullineaux
- Mnemonic: or, When Dr Asperger met Dr Alzheimer, by Mandy Macdonald
- The List of Things I Can’t Explain (After John Cooper Clarke) by Nigel Lloyd
- Driven Bats, by Jim Lawrence
- Instructions for reading a gas meter, by Ama Bolton
- GDPR, by Marie Studer
- This shit?, by Jo Sachs-Eldridge
- There’s no toilet seats in the psych ward, by Aoife Cunningham
- Sleeping Legion, by Jennie E. Owen
- When Brian Became Broccoli, by Ben Macnair
- Why I ended up (for a while) in Hull, by Janet Sillett
- Ode to a Pee Funnel, by Christine Fowler
- The camera never lies, by Sarah J Bryson
- Grumbles, by Amanda Baker
- The Tale of Little Red Riding Hood, by Trisha Broomfield
- Poem by Julia Whatley
- I am the Genie in the Jar, by Mandy Beattie
- Padraig – Who Drove the Snakes Out of Ireland, by Pratibha Castle
- Record Players are just trendy, phonographs are the real thing, by Jorge Leiva Ardana
- First Mayor of Richmond, by Peter Kay
- Because it’s total crap, by Karen Jones
- My Mother Doesn’t Know that I’m a Poet, by Rodney Wood
- The Free Spirit Ward of Court, by Aoife Cunningham
- Or your scants will come back to haunt you, by Beth McDonough
- Trespasses to be prosecuted, by Rebecca Gethin
- On Flatulence, by Simon Williams
- Spring in Castletroy, by D’or Seifer
- King Edward VII, by Steve Harrison
- Speed Dating, by Enna Michaels
- Sarah, the Neighbour’s Child, by Lisa Lopresti
- Health Check, by Mary Dickins
- Penny Dreadful, by Phil Binding
- Juniper Park, by Lee Campbell
- One of my Finest, by Clive Oseman
- Apple, by Clive Donovan
- Slipping back into the creation of me, by I Am Cereal Killer
- Ketchup : An Obituary, by Kevin Higgins
- Jax, By Anne McDonald
- There’s a pervert in the craft shop, by Ronnie Leek
- Nursery Rhyme to a President, by Joan Hardiman
- Chicken Mystery, by Catherine Doherty Nicholls
- Fairy-tale Romances, by Ama Bolton
- I never wear knickers to breakfast, by Heather Moulsen
- Disappearing Act, by Lucy Tertia George
- Broccoli, by Melanie Branton
- Sauce and Condiments, by Nigel Lloyd
- For the Breakdown Men of the Leamington Spa Vehicle Recovery Office, by Kerry Priest
- I want to be . . . By Geraldine Ward
- To my first boyfriend, by Carla Scarano
- What’s that?, by Judy Darley
- To Whom It Concerns A Late Late After Word, by Susan Lindsay
- You Know!, by Carl Burkitt
- Diminishing Poem Spliced with an Ovi, by Trisha Broomfield
- My Other Sticker is Funny, by Claire Hadfield
- Not every mushroom is safe to eat, by Jorge Leiva Ardana
- Alive in the Age of Stupidity, by Chad Norman
- Paddy Andy, by Joe Naughton
- Vague Notions, by Ruth Marshall
- Doing It, by Heather Moulson
- Cleaning Up, by Sue Spiers
- Recently Reactivated Twitter Account, by Stephen McNulty
- Advice for undergraduates re-submitting work for this semester’s poetry module, by Emma Purshouse
- Tuesday, by Hugh Maxwell
- Tango, by Trevor Alexander
- Forever and an Hour, by Patricia Walsh
- Trial by Poetry, by Oscar Windsor-Smith
- Precitive Text, by Nigel Lloyd
- I Used to Smoke, by Rodney Wood
- Ultimate Bathroom Experience, by Kevin Higgins
- Saboteurs, by Holly Conant
- Five Limericks, by Mark Totterdell
- Dear Sir/Madam – by Karen Jones
- Evolution of a Complaint, by Roisin Bugler
- The agony of treading on Lego in bare feet at 3.30am, by Gabi Marcellus-Temple
- Truth, by Maurice Devitt
- The Half-Starved Virgin, by Bobbie Sparrow
- Gannet, by Catherine Doherty Nicholls
- Nothing, by Ama Bolton
- Do dust mites eat ginger biscuits?, by Trisha Broomfield
- Ads for adults, not suitable for children, by Carole Donaldson
- Buffoon in a flowery shirt, by Hannah Kiely
- Never eat shellfish, by Janet Sillett
- What the Dickens, by Julian Isaacs
- Duolingual and becoming 007, by Beth McDonough
- Wallpaper, by Anne Donnellan
- Coup de Tea, by Bern Butler
- able, by beam
- The Weather says ‘Wake up’, after Dorothy Parker, by Art Ó Súilleabháin
- Fruit, by Stephen Wren
- A Grudge, by Heather Moulson
- Good Morning Mr Magpie, by Teresa O’Connor
- The Emperor and the Daddy, by Michael Allsopp
- Enrichment, by Katherine Noone
- The World Has Run Out of Curry, by Nigel Lloyd
- Honorificabilitudinitatibus, by Mohammad Zahid
- Openings, by Mary Lee
- Dr Queenie May, by Sally McHugh
- After the . ., by Siobhan Potter
- You Gave me a Geranium, by Robert Garnham
- Particles, by Marcus Bales
- The Night I Told Genesis to Fuck Off, by Rodney Wood
- Mind Games, by Emma Purshouse
- This Is Not a Pipe Dream, by Julian Isaacs
- The Bigger Issues, by Clive Oseman
- Delta of Venus on the Bus, by Neil Fulwood
- Pants, by Sue Cose
- Trousers, by Ray Givans
- In Praise of the May Tree (Perhaps an Ode) by Hillary Willmott
- When Two Worlds Collide, by Jeff Horsey
- Invisibility Rant, by Abigail Ottley
- The best superhero we can conjur, by Rob Schofield
- Uncle Peter, by Nigel Lloyd
- I’m sorry I’m late, by Susan Jordan
- What I’m Like, by Kevin Higgins
- The Mermaid and the Onion Seller, by Rosie Barrett
- The Astronomer’s Wife, by Rose Cook
- Poem by Tom Stockley
- My Shot, by Nikki Fine
- Maisie, by Maggie Duffy
- it started with a Body, by Julian Isaacs
- Art Students in a City Park, by Patrick Deeley
- Three Poems by Daniel Ryan
- Jan, Jen or Jean, by Thomas McColl
- Yes, But He Lives in the Philippines, by Thom Boulton
- Two Limericks from Mark Totterdell
- Lockdown Occupation, by Sarah Burchell
- What Can You Do?, by John Murphy
- What Can You Do?, by John Murphy
- What Can You Do?, by John Murphy
- Neighbourhood Watch, by Maurice Devitt
- Boring, by Carl Burkitt
- How to Read at an Open Mic, by Susan Jordan
- 4 By Bloody 4’s, by Lisa Lopresti
- Cocks, by Mohammad Zahid
- Double Negative Party, by Melanie Branton
- Marc Maron, by Tina Sederholm
- Quark, by Trisha Broomfield
- Mourning what he lost, by Rodney Wood
- Lockdown Haircut, by Mogs
- Poem by Jonathan Humphrey
- How to have the perfect wardrobe, by Heather Moulson
- Long Johns, by Jamie H. Scrutton
- Long Johns, by Jamie H. Scrutton
- I will survive, by Dora Wright
- bird feeder regulars by Susan Taylor
- bird feeder regulars by Susan Taylor
- Ending up a vegetable, by Ray Pool
- Banana Pooh!, by Andy Brown
- Purple? Purple?, by Simon Williams
Comments
- raypoolpoetry on The Thirty-Five Seconds University, by Phil KnightAn astutely observed ironical chroinicle.
- Mark Cassidy on The Thirty-Five Seconds University, by Phil KnightVery droll. I love it!
- Paula Gilfillan on The Thirty-Five Seconds University, by Phil KnightJust loved this! Thank you for making me laugh.
- Tim Dwyer on The Thirty-Five Seconds University, by Phil KnightWell done Phil Knight
- Margaret Kiernan on The Sad Life of the Shared Scone, by Terri MetcalfeWonderful, Teri. Congratulations
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